Is there a OEM or Standard button that is used to send a tool to the tool change position ?  I have tried to use X Home or Y Home etc. but the axis moves at an unbelievable
speed when I tried those, almost instantaneous homing.

I must be missing something........

I have tried adjusting the jog feedrates and every other feedrate that I could find but nothing changes this behavior.

Not standard, but
I put a "TCP" button on the RUN screen with the following script.

'For using TCP on Settings Screen
x=GetUserDRO(1200)
y=GetUserDRO(1201)
z=GetUserDRO(1202)
code"G90"
code"G0"
code"G53Z"&z 
code"G53X"&x &"Y"&y

Then enter the position you want for the tool change in the dro's on the settings screen.

Under homing/limits what do you have set for your homing speed? in %